Of late I have been inspired to live with self control and healthy eating habits. Some people make that look so easy! But me? naaaah. I'll have a few good days filled with eating fruits and vegetables and healthy portion sizes, but then something like this will happen. To set the stage I must start at the beginning: and what good story doesn't start with work? So:
Donut shift: refers to working the hours of 12 am - 9 am at making (you'll never guess) donuts!
and that is what I did last night, finally reaching home at a quarter past 9, a little bit bug eyed, and a lot bit dazed and confused due to lack of caffeinated beverages.
I fell into bed and slept the sleep of a dead woman until 1:30, when I suddenly woke up with one thing on my mind: pop tarts.
First I resisted the temptation. I ate a banana.
But the dogged mantra that kept resounding through my head wouldn't stop:
pop tarts, pop tarts, pop tarts.
Staggering into the kitchen, I rummaged through the cupboards until I found that which I desired. Pop tarts.
Pop tarts: normally found in our house only after three rare occurrences in nature: a. the apocalypse. b. winning the lottery, and c. pop tart/movie parties.
Since number c. had just occurred a few days earlier, the fields were ripe for the picking, with pop tart options spanning from strawberry frosted to blueberry muffin to cookies and cream. Grabbing a packet of each, I headed back to my room to do that which is only heard of in dreams: watching old x-men cartoons and eating pop tarts. On a few hours of sleep. Good idea, Feesh. Good time to make decisions.
About a box of pop tarts (and leftover halloween candy to boot) and a few episodes of x-men later I had finally had enough. To quote Rico from Hot Rod: "It started out super positive, then it just got crazy."
and it did. If you take 5 measures of sugar high and mix them with about 2 cups of self disgust, and 1/2 a cup of nasty feeling, and you'll get about what I felt in those hours after the pop tart binge. or, to put it into word format: errrrgggbluuuuugiiiiickkkaaaaaackkkkuggggblehblehblehheeeuuugaaahhhmmfffff.
So that's what happened. I was sad for a while, and wallowed in self disgust for a little bit. Seriously, sometimes I hate my lack of self control. it makes me feel like a crappy person. I wish I had everything together, and something like eating an entire box of pop tarts can pop my shallow illusion that I am getting better at things. I mean a WHOLE box of pop tarts?! Agh!
Anyways, rant over, tomorrow is a new day, and I am determined to have healthy eating habits once again.
And we don't have any more pop tarts in the house, so yay.